Habits
by MoreCowbell
Summary: Nancy and Malcolm, while their sons were off saving the world.


HABITS  
by Trish 

This was partly inspired by a scene in the last episode of Digimon (season one).

* * *

"I'm worried."

She'd said it at least eight times in the last fourteen minutes. It was one of her nervous habits.

Everyone had them.

She paced back and forth on the pavement, wringing her hands and repeating the same statement over and over.

He was smoking. Like a chimney.

She'd always hated when he did that.

"I'm worried."

Ninth time.

He exhaled a particularly large puff of smoke.

Back. Forth. Back. Forth. Back. Forth. Her heels clicked against the concrete as she paced.

"I'm-"

"Worried, right?" he tossed his cigarette to the ground and crushed in underneath his shoe, "Don't worry, Nancy. I believe you. You don't have to keep repeating yourself."

She narrowed her eyes at him, "I'm not in the mood for any of your little remarks. Unlike you, I'm afraid for my boys."

"Have a little faith, woman," he craned his neck heavenwards... Although, what greeted him was a far cry from heaven, "TK and Matt are going to survive... And what's more, they're going to make sure all the rest of us do too."

The woman regarded her ex-husband with disbelief, "So you're telling me that you're perfectly calm? That you don't have this terrible feeling in the pit of your stomach?" She shook her head, "I don't think that's even possible for a parent."

"Don't get me wrong," he said, "I'm scared as hell of what might happen... I know this world isn't made up of happily ever afters. But I'm not going to torture myself, and I'm not going to doubt my sons when they've never given me reason to before."

"Malcolm," his words had taken the fight right out of her, "I wish I could do what you do. I wish I could tell myself that it will all be okay, and believe it," she sighed heavily, and closed her eyes.

He lit another cigarette.

"Matt promised to take care of TK," he told her, "And that's a promise he'll keep. Nothing else means more to him than his little brother."

She somehow found it in herself to smile at the statement, "I know. Matt's such a good boy." Her words were filled with sadness and regret.

"He thinks you hate him, you know," he said, as a matter of factly, "That you love TK more than you could ever love him. He thinks you gave him away."

Habits.

He always spoke before thinking; said things he didn't really mean. He wouldn't realize how much they hurt until later, and by then it was too late to take them back.

"I don't hate him," she said it forcefully; angrily. Her hands were starting to shake, "I don't hate him and he knows it. He knows how I feel about him."

The man breathed in the nicotine fumes, "If you say so."

Whenever he did something wrong, he always closed himself off; said flippant things to make it seem like nothing bothered or interested him. He did it so often, that it started to rub off on his son.

'Forget about it'. 'Whatever'. 'I don't care'.

"Why do you always do that?" she demanded, wanting to blame all her son's problems on his father. His coldness, his insensitivity, his inability to get along with her... It all had to be his fault. "Why do you do any of the things you do? It's-"

"It's a habit," he interrupted, "A habit. Sort of like repeating an 'I'm worried' mantra while pacing a whole in concrete."

She folded her arms over her chest, "I love Matt. If he doesn't know it now, then I'll make sure he does when he gets back."

The man smiled, "So you believe they're coming back, then?"

She was startled; she hadn't even realized what she'd said, "I... I guess I do."

"Well, that's good," he dropped his cigarette to the floor, though she noticed it still seemed quite fresh.

He had so many annoying habits. He smoked like a model and cursed like a sailor. He was so obsessed with chasing after stories, he sometimes didn't come home for days at a time. He didn't shave when he didn't feel like it. He often didn't realize when he was being insensitive, and he was rude when his feelings were hurt.

But, she reflected, wryly, he always knew how to cheer her up.

After all, there had to be at least one reason she married him.

* * *

**NOTES**  
I have a fixation with Matt's dad. I think I like Matt's dad better than Matt.


End file.
